Dear Eric: I was a lawyer when I had memory problems at the age of 65. I retired and then learned that I had a devastating rare dementia with a very short lifespan. Instead of offering support to me, my friends disappeared from my life, at the time I needed them the most. Friends can gather around them if they have cancer, lead them to chemo treatments, give food and other things to support them. If you have dementia, everyone simply disappears.
I've always been a sociable person and I miss it so much, but I have no idea how or where to start. Any ideas?
– leave from friends
Dear friends: Sometimes people don't know what to do or say when they are confronted with illness, but that's not an excuse for the behavior of their friends and I'm sorry. The Alzheimer Association (Alz.org) has a wealth of resources for people with dementia, including support groups, both online and personally. To be able to talk to others about what you experience and feel helps with isolation.
This can also be a time for you to explore new opportunities for volunteers or social groups that have nothing to do with dementia depending on the care plan and skills. They are a person who is worth a connection with a wealth of experiences and knowledge that others can benefit from. Your company is welcomed in a senior center, a local excursion group or an organization that matches your interests and values. If you are afraid to navigate these rooms with dementia or need accommodation to feel safe, please do not hesitate to contact yourself in advance and talk to a group leader about how you can take part in the most convenient.
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Send questions to R. Eric Thomas under Eric@askingeric.com or mailbox 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him further Instagram and register for his weekly newsletter rericthomas.com.